Yay!

On August 13th, 2008, I got engaged.  Now most people, once they overcome the shock of the fact that I, Bill Griepenstroh, am engaged, have been really happy for me.  Anyone who knows me, and knows Lindsay, knows that there is no one else I'd rather be with and that marrying her will make me the happiest man alive.  

Lindsay and I have known each other for 8 years, and for the first 6 she would have never in her wildest dreams imagined herself with me, and I probably couldn't have imagined myself with her during most of that time either.  I always respected her though, and I knew she was someone I could date, if God wanted me to date anyone.  

My senior year I started to develop this crush on her, and the more time I spent around her the more I realized that I wanted to try to date her.  I had never dated anyone before, but I was determined to make her my first girlfriend, and I didn't give up.  After years of being rejected by girl after girl, I finally did things mostly right, and she decided to give me a chance...either that or she caved to my persistance 

However, it wasn't the right time and I got dumped.  It was hard at the time because I really liked Lindsay, and I respected the heck out of her.  It took me a long time to get over it. Eventually, however, I realized that it probably wouldn't work again unless God wanted it to. 

Last fall, I went to the same school as her, not because I'm a creepy stalker or something, but because CCC Hastings had a program I wanted to get into.  At first it was awkward, but some things happened and eventually Lindsay and I ended up becoming really great friends- better friends than we had ever been before.  But we were just friends.

I tried so hard to make sure that she was just a friend in my mind.  But eventually I realized that I was still attracted to her and that I had still secretly held on to the hope that maybe we could date again. It nearly drove me insane.  

As I have developed my Christian walk over the past few years, I have developed a good habit- when something bothers me, I pray about it.  So I started to pray, and let me tell you that I have never prayed more consistently about anything in my entire life.  I prayed that God would either take away my desire to date her again, or that He would give me another chance with her.

The desire didn't go away, and our friendship became stronger and stronger.  Eventually, I couldn't keep it a secret anymore.  During Christmas break last school year, I told her that I liked her, and that I couldn't help it.  She knew it was true, but hoped it wasn't because she was afraid that me liking her would screw up our great friendship.

At that point, I realized that I was in the much feared "friend zone" and that very few escape with their lives.  I had to take on a different strategy.  Over the course of the next month, I stepped back from the friendship here and there to show her that it wasn't the friendship that she really wanted, it was the friend (me).  During that time I kept on praying that maybe we could date again.

Finally, Lindsay came around.  Around the beginning of February, she finally realized that she liked me.  But to her surprise, I didn't get all excited and try to date her immediately.  I wanted to be patient, and pray about things.  It surprised her because I had changed, because my past self would have just jumped right into it.  And when she began to see how much God had changed me since high school, she began to like me even more.

After over a month of prayer, I finally went and talked to her parents, because I knew that I needed their permission if we were going to have a relationship that was pleasing to God.  I met with her parents, they gave me permission, and we started dating on March 19th, 2008.

At first, I worried a lot.  I had only been in two relationships before this one (one was with her), and one lasted a month, and one lasted a week.  In neither of those situations did I pray consistently and truly seek God's will. With this relationship, I realized that I needed to trust God in everything, and to realize that if this were truly His will, that things would work out.  I kept praying.  I prayed for Lindsay, and I prayed that our relationship would be honoring to the Lord.  I also prayed that if God would help me to know if He wanted me to marry Lindsay.  

Our relationship hit a week, a month, and then two months.  After two months, I started to realize that this really was working out, and that the only way I could mess this up is if I quit following the Lord, and there was no way I was going to do that!  I said, "I love you" and she said "I love you too!"  

I had never told a girl I loved her before...and the awesome thing was that I knew I wasn't wasting my words.  I really do love her, and the best part is that I know she loves me back.  It is a love that isn't temporary or from the flesh, but God has given me the ability to love her regardless of her flaws, and He has given her the ability to love me regardless of my many more flaws   The world tells you that it is great to be young and in love, and they are right.  However, it is much greater to be following God's will and to be in love.  The happiness from that is far greater.

We kept dating.  I worked at Covenant Cedars all summer and I didn't see her that often.  I never once took for granted how blessed I was to be dating her.  And after just three months of dating and consistent prayer, the Lord began to show me that He wanted me to marry Lindsay, and that scared me.  I didn't want to move fast.  I wanted to take things slow and respect the fact that Lindsay is a very cautious person.  So I started to pray more intensly.  When litle hints began to be dropped here and there that Lindsay didn't care how long we dated, and we became more and more comfortable talking about the "M" word...I finally one evening just blurted out, "I want to marry you someday!"  When I said that, I was shocked when she said that she desired the same thing, and that God had given her a peace in her heart about it.  

Three and a half months into dating and we already wanted to get married?  On March 19th I would have never guessed, but when you truly trust the Lord with something, there is nothing to argue with.  He worked fast, and I am no man to slow down His will from working.

However, even though we were both sure about it...we still had to be patient.  It took me almost another month to work up the courage to talk to her dad, and even though I knew he'd say yes, asking a man who has raised his daughter in godliness for 21 years to just trust another younger and much more inexperienced man to love her the way she deserves to be loved is quite a lot to ask for.

But I talked to him, and he trusts me with her, and said yes without any doubt.  It was clearly another work of the Lord to give him a peace about that.

I was worried about how I would pay for the ring, because I wasn't going to settle for some crappy Wal-mart ring or something.  The girl of my dreams deserves only the best!  I prayed about that, and the Lord answered my prayer when my mom gave me a family heirloom ring that has been passed down three generations to me, and it is nice!  Someday my wife and I will give it to my son when he finds the girl of his dreams.

It took a week for it to get re-fitted, and then Lindsay was in Minnesota, but I proposed almost right away once she got back.

THIS IS SO LONG!  I am getting tired of typing.  I set out to tell the story of the engagement, but I told so much more.  I will write about that next time.  I will also give a sneak-peek of our wedding.

-bill

P.S. God has blessed me.