Our Wedding

Kashi yatra refers to an age-old Brahmin ritual where the groom "decides" to take up 'sanyaasam' (i.e. asceticism, monkhood) for spiritual pursuit. He proceeds to make his way to Kasi (Varanasi), with slippers, umbrella and a bamboo fan. He would ultimately be 'convinced' by the bride's father to return and take up "grahastham" or family life and that the bride will assist in his subsequent spiritual pursuit. The groom is then escorted back under the shade of the umbrella.

The maapillai (groom) will then agree to forfeit his trip to Kashi, having been "convinced" by the bride's father to stay back instead. Garlands will be exchanged by the bride and groom (maalai maatral). The process of maalai maatral may be complicated by the groom's side carrying the groom and the bride's side cayring the bride and each side making it difficult for the other side to correctly place the garland. Basically traditional family entertainment.

The bride and the groom sit on a swing and married women from both families greet them. They circle rice balls around the couple and fling them away in all four directions to ward off the evil eye.

Significance: The chains of the swing signify the eternal karmic link with the Almighty and the to-and-fro motion represents the undulating waves of life. In mind and body, the bride and groom shall move in harmony, unperturbed and steady.

The parents of the bride formally offer their daughter in marriage. The bride is seated on her father's lap and the yoke of a plough is touched to her forehead.

Significance: This symbolizes that just as two bullocks are required to carry the plough and work and till the fields in harmony, so also will she and her husband remain side by side through life.

The Mangal Sutra or Thali consists of two pieces, one from each family, traditionally dangling on a yellow thread blessed by the elders. The groom ties the first knot of the Mangal Sutra around the bride's neck. The groom's sister then ties the second and third knots as all the guests shower their blessings (symbolized by rice grains that are distribued to all guests to shower onto the bride and groom).

Significance: The bride's in-laws pledge to care for and protect the bride.

The Sapthapadi stems from the belief that when you walk seven steps with a person, you become friends. The bride, standing in front of the sacred fire, takes seven steps towards the east or north, with the groom holding her right foot with his left hand.

Significance: With each step the groom recites the following seven vows -
May He follow your first step and provide you food in abundance
May He follow your second step and give you physical strength
May He follow your third step for religious vow
May He follow your fourth step for the attainment of bliss
With your fifth step may He bless you with wealth
With your sixth step may He confer happiness through all six seasons

With the seventh step may He bless you while performing religious rituals