It used to be that gift registries were the norm, however with the average age for marrying on the rise, many couples have already established households and have accumulated everything they need before they get married, and really don’t want to end up with two toasters, blenders, etc. Many couples are shelling out a serious sum of cash for their wedding themselves, and the idea of money for a honeymoon, down payment on a house or simply some spending cash to put toward the expense of a wedding is more appealing.
Most will agree that it is no longer considered tacky to request money instead of household items as long as you do it tactfully. The first few years of marriage are often full of surprise expenses. If a couple is in need of cash, my opinion is that it is a great idea to ask for what they really need.
Honeymoon in Rocky Point, Mexico
It is considered tacky to speak of anything other than requesting their presence at your wedding in a “wedding invitation.” That is a definite no-no! Asking for cash as a wedding gift can be touchy, particularly when it comes to etiquette conscious or older guests, who may not feel comfortable giving anything other than a traditional wedding gift.
When people know where the money is going, they tend to feel a lot better about the act of giving cash at a wedding. They will often ask the members of the bridal party and your immediate family for your registry information. Clue the members of your bridal party and family to respond by saying, “The bride and groom have a registry at Crate & Barrel (or wherever) however they request that you go to www.CashWeddingGift.com to contribute to the savings plan they have for a down payment on a house because they have just about everything they need to set up housekeeping,” (or: “The bride and groom have a registry at Crate & Barrel however they request that you go to www.CashWeddingGift.com to contribute their ‘honeymoon fund’ (or: ‘replace our dilapidated car fund’) because they have just about everything they need to set up housekeeping.”
If you are looking for the best wedding registry for your wedding, you found it. CashWeddingGift helps you get the gift you really want. It’s an online cash wedding registry where guests can easily and securely give cash gifts to engaged couples. Use your cash gifts to buy a home, help pay for your wedding or honeymoon or even start a retirement or college fund. CashWeddingGift.com is the fastest and easiest online cash wedding registry available. It’s convenient, safe and secure.
“Nowadays, with family and friends living across the country and at various stages in their lives, it’s definitely acceptable for a bride and groom to ask for gift cards or cash. It’s a great way to make it convenient for the guests and easy on them. I don’t think it’s tacky, whereas you can ask for gift cards on your registry, as far as cash, just be polite about it. You usually want to spread it by word of mouth. You definitely don’t want to put ‘cash only’ on your Website and you never put it on your invitation.” ~ Anna Post
Be sure to include any user IDs or passwords that guests will need in order to give a monetary gift via your chosen cash registry website.
Have more questions about CashWeddingGift.com? Click here!
BONUS Video: Is It Bad To Ask For Money As A Gift From Your Guests?
Video (How it works!): Copyright © 2012 – CashWeddingGift.com.
Text: Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s “romantic” Wedding Website. Larry James is an award winning, non-denominational wedding officiant and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: 480-998-9411 or 800-725-9223. Pre-maritial relationship coaching is available and not required. You will find more than 470 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com. Something NEW about weddings is posted every 4th day on this Wedding BLOG. Check Larry’s availability.
Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com
NOTE: All articles, “LoveNotes” and wedding tips listed in this Wedding BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.
Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
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When we make the most important decision of our life – to marry – many of us have no idea what we are getting into. I repeat… “no idea!”
Do you?
“When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and exhausting condition continuously until death do them part.” ~ George Bernard Shaw
Look before you leap. Slow down! Don’t get in such a big hurry! “Always date for one year before you make a proposal before marriage,” says Louanne Cole Weston, PhD, a marriage and family therapist. “You need to see how the other person behaves 365 days of the year – birthdays, deaths, Thanksgiving, etc. You learn how they treat these events and treat you before, during, and after they occur. Give relationship a full four seasons before you think about marriage.”
I agree! I believe in long engagements. At least long enough so that you experience the good, bad and the not so good; long enough to really get to know each other. You can’t do that in a 6 month relationship… or a two month relationship. I performed the marriage ceremony for a couple several years ago. They had known each other for a little less than 2 months, both in their lower 20s. We talked at length about some of the things to watch for that could cause bumps in the road but they were both “so in love” (and I might add, to blind to see) that they both lacked the maturity necessary to have them side-step the little issues that most couples face and 8 months later the bride called me crying saying that they were no longer together.
Psychologists say the typical infatuation (or “lust”) lasts 6 to 18 months. So, if a total of 19 or more months elapses between first meeting and the wedding, there’s a much better chance it’s really love and that it will last.
It takes much more than love, boys and girls! Both parties must be ready for the long-term commitment of marriage in all aspects, financially, spiritually, emotionally and in maturity. In the beginning – for most couples – it’s about having fun, enjoying each others company finding out that you both like a lot of the same things. They need to spend more time talking about their relationship – their future (when the time seems right), their values, and their differences.
“It’s easy to love your partner when things are great. The true test of a marriage is when things are not going so well; when you have to sacrifice for your partner; when you have to come together as a team to face differences and difficulties.” ~ Lori and Bob Hollander
Ask lots of questions. Really get to know each other. You must have open and honest communication. If you are putting your best foot forward, make sure it’s connected to the real you. You have to stop trying to live up to your partner’s expectations and just be yourself.
If you don’t do that, in six months to a year they will discover the real you. As a relationship coach that is the time I hear some partner’s say… “Wow! I didn’t know that about him.” “After we had been together for awhile, I discovered that she really likes to have things her way most of the time. I just go along.”
Hmmm. Just going along will only last for a little while. Be yourself.
There are so many things to consider that many couples let slide because “they are in love.”
• Who will control the families money? Separate accounts or joint? Do you know your partner’s credit score? Money troubles plague many couples and it’s important to discuss this aspect of your relationship before it spins out of control. If she makes more money than you do can you handle that?
• If there are children from previous marriages, how will you handle that?
• Do you want to have children? If so, how many? Children affect a marriage in many ways; sleep-deprivation and disagreements on the proper amount and administration of discipline are just a couple of examples.
• How will you handle the chores?
• What about Spirituality? How important is it and how will we teach the kids if you are both of different faiths?
• Nicole Teague asks, “Are you ready to get married? During their teens and 20′s, people change considerably. Until a person has matured as an individual, it is difficult to know if a relationship that worked for them in their younger years will still be working for them years later. Have you experienced everything you wanted to as a single person?”
• Is there anything you feel you need to talk about but haven’t?
• Discuss your expectations about sex, your preferences and fears.
• Are there times when you need to be left alone?
• Do you have mutual goals for your life, your career and your marriage?
• Have we fully disclosed our health histories, both physical and mental?
• Do You value and respect each other?
• Do you like and respect each others friends?
• Should either of you sign a prenuptial, or premarital, agreement?
• How will you handle disagreements? Will you promise each other to seek help if needed?
• Any addictions? Alcohol, drugs, sex, porn, gambling? Discuss how you’re going to handle this as a couple.
These are just a few things to consider. Talk to each other about these things and anything else that comes up and really listen.
When you think you have found “the one,” how do you know that for sure? The usual response is always the same, “You just know.” While that is true… it really doesn’t help much.
“Knowing comes from time spent contemplating your similarities, your differences, and how well you fit together. It comes from making the decision in your heart that you will remain committed to this person no matter what the future holds.” ~ Belinda Elliott
Take your time before you commit to marriage. Getting married will not fix problems within a relationship. Don’t rush into things. Take some time to consider why you want to get married in the first place. Many people get married thinking that they can change the other person. If something doesn’t seem right you need to know that after marriage it’s highly doubtful if it will change than. Getting married isn’t really about the wedding day – it’s about the quality of the relationship that follows. Wait on marriage until you are absolutely certain. If there is any doubt… don’t do it!
BONUS Articles: Are You Ready for Marriage?
276 Questions to Ask Before You Marry
The Marriage Test
Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s “romantic” Wedding Website. Larry James is an award winning, non-denominational wedding officiant and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: 480-998-9411 or 800-725-9223. Pre-maritial relationship coaching is available and not required. You will find more than 470 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com. Something NEW about weddings is posted every 4th day on this Wedding BLOG. Check Larry’s availability.
Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com
NOTE: All articles, “LoveNotes” and wedding tips listed in this Wedding BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.
Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationship BLOG” at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com/
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Authors & Speakers” BLOG at: http://AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.wordpress.com
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This idea fall into the category of “Why didn’t I think of this before??!!” 
Tradition says the parents of the bride sit in the front row on the left side and the parents of the groom sit in the front row on the right side.
When the couple walks up the aisle, the bride is usually on the left and whoever is escorting her is on the right. Once the groom takes his place next to the bride their backs are to the guests. In my “romantic” wedding ceremony after about 6 minutes into the presentation of the ceremony they are asked to face each other holding hands.
Here’s the problem I noticed recently. When the bride faces the groom, she is facing away from her parents and the only thing they see is her back. The parents of the groom can only see the back of the groom.
Solution: Seat the parents of the bride on the right side and the parents of the groom on the left side. I know, that’s not tradition, however the first time we actually seated the parents in this manner, both sets of parents came up to me after the ceremony to personally thank me for allowing them to see the expressions on the faces of their daughter and son as the ceremony was being performed.
If you like this idea, please be sure to let the Wedding Consultant and the wedding coordinator at your wedding venue, otherwise tradition will most likely be the rule of the day.
BONUS Articles: Who (of the bridal party) Walks Down the Aisle First?
Traditional Wedding or NOT!?
Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s “romantic” Wedding Website. Larry James is an award winning, non-denominational wedding officiant and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: 480-998-9411 or 800-725-9223. Pre-maritial relationship coaching is available and not required. You will find more than 470 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com. Something NEW about weddings is posted every 4th day on this Wedding BLOG. Check Larry’s availability.
Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com
NOTE: All articles, “LoveNotes” and wedding tips listed in this Wedding BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.
Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationship BLOG” at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com/
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Authors & Speakers” BLOG at: http://AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.wordpress.com
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In solving crimes, police officers rely on what they call a hunch or a “gut feeling.” It’s defined as instinctive feeling, intuition; also called gut reaction. When working with wedding vendors… trust your gut feeling.
“Your unconscious brain is intelligent enough to select the best options,” according to a study let by Mathias Pessiglione, a neuroscientist at the Centre for Neuroimaging Research in Paris, France.
Sit down with each vendor and talk to them to see if they can actually create the vision you have of your wedding. Be strategic when interviewing them and rely on more than just the references. Look for a vendor who goes above and beyond your expectations. Beware of the high pressure sales pitch: The best vendors are eager for your business but not desperate. Also beware of part-timers. Look for vendors who are in the wedding business full-time.
When you trust your gut feeling you will avoid obnoxious and cheesy DJs, florists who do not make the arrangements as agreed, talented photographers who are rude to guests (or, heaven forbid, to you), caterers who consistently run behind schedule, a cake baker with a sloppy cake, and a dress shop that brings in a wedding dress inferior to the one you ordered and won’t return your deposit. If you feel the least bit discomfort in the interview process, run the other way.
Don’t choose the first vendor you find with the cheapest price, however, when your gut feeling says, “This is the one!” you would be wise to offer a deposit to secure your date. Shop value, not just price. The great wedding vendors are very busy and the choice date book quickly.
After you do your due diligent, you owe it to yourself to hire the best of the best and then let go and let them to their job. Full-time wedding vendors do what they do all the time. Trust them to do what they do best. They’re good at what they do. Let them work their magic. Don’t trust blindly though. Do your homework up front. A wedding vendor who offers you a low price and low quality is a recipe for a very expensive mistake. Your vendors will become a part of your life for the next several months so choose wisely.
Weddings can be the most stressful and emotional event you can help plan if you try to micromanage it every step of the way. If you do not trust your wedding vendors, you worry. That’s what make’s it stressful. Hiring a wedding vendor can be scary. You are in essence, purchasing something that at the time you pay for it, is invisible.
To a full-time professional wedding vendor, your wedding is not “just another wedding”. They will work to make it very special for you – the kind of wedding that will be memorable for you and your guests.
Do your vendors respond to your e-mail, text messages, and phone calls in a timely manner? Do they take the initiative in contacting you, or do they wait for a reminder from you? Not doing so can be a red flag.
Before you start micromanaging every decision your wedding vendors make, remember one thing: you’re paying them for a reason. Consider their experience and expertise an opportunity for you to relax and enjoy your wedding. They want you to love the result because your recommendation hinges on it. They’re going to strive to please. Wouldn’t you rather help someone who trusts your abilities rather than second-guesses everything you do? There’s no harm in giving a good amount of direction in the beginning, but asking for daily progress reports is overkill and eats into the time it takes them to do a great job.
One of the reasons I have a Wedding Blog is to build trust over the long-term with potential brides and grooms. I want them to see how involved I am in the industry. I want them to know that I know the wedding business – inside and out – not just what it takes to be an award winning Wedding OFficiant.
Business relationships are built on trust. Make sure to hire someone you feel you can trust. If you don’t get the sense that the wedding vendor you are interviewing is someone you can trust, don’t move forward with them just because you’re getting a deal or you like the price. Trust your gut feeling! Shout, “NEXT!” and hire someone else!
A great vendor relationship will result in a smoother planning process and a seemless and stress-free wedding day. Take a deep breath and enjoy your special day.
Trust leads to a happy, stress-free wedding day and a lasting marriage.
BONUS Article: Trusting your wedding vendors
Beware of “Cheap” Wedding Vendors!
Why You Should Go With Your Gut Feeling
Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s “romantic” Wedding Website. Larry James is an award winning, non-denominational wedding officiant and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: 480-998-9411 or 800-725-9223. Pre-maritial relationship coaching is available and not required. You will find more than 470 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com. Something NEW about weddings is posted every 4th day on this Wedding BLOG. Check Larry’s availability.
Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com
NOTE: All articles, “LoveNotes” and wedding tips listed in this Wedding BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.
Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationship BLOG” at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com/
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Authors & Speakers” BLOG at: http://AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.wordpress.com
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Repeat this aloud: “I will actually eat dinner at my reception – that includes cake – and I will take time to enjoy it!”
Weddings are a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for a couple to make a declaration of love, commitment and independence. There is a lot that goes into the planning of a wedding. More than most brides and grooms realize. Your reception will most likely be the high point of your wedding day. It will most likely be the largest party you’ll ever throw. Don’t allow the whole process to become an ordeal. There’s going to be so much going on, and everything’s got to be perfect. NOT!! Let go of the quest for perfection.
Most brides and grooms today are foregoing the receiving line and allowing their guests to offer their congratulations at the reception. The thing to remember is to sit with your new partner, relax as best you can with all the excitement around you and truly enjoy your meal. Take your time. You will have plenty of time during the remaining part of the reception and table-hop to visit with your guests.
Many brides and grooms often tell me that everything was so hurry-skurry that they really didn’t get to enjoy the meal.
Hot Tip: Have the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner two days before the wedding, NOT the night before. This idea separates two stressful days and gives you a day of rest before the wedding to get last-minute things done. If you are anticipating a party… this extra day keeps you and your bridal party from arriving at your wedding with a hangover.
Get a good night’s sleep before the wedding. Eight hours works good. Breakfast is your start to the day—it’s your first meal, the one that gives you energy and fuels you until lunch or even the reception dinner. Breakfast might be the only meal you have until dinner. Do yourself a favor and eat a decent breakfast.
If you spend your whole wedding day directing the photographer and making sure the bridal party makes their entrance on cue, you’ll be missing out on a lot of amazing memories. Make sure you take time with your new husband to really enjoy the party you worked so hard to plan. Let go of control.
It will be difficult to enjoy your wedding reception meal unless it is as stress-free as possible. That’s why all the planning of the reception – especially the meal – needs to be completed at least several weeks (or more) before the wedding.
My first suggestion would be to at least hire a “day-of wedding consultant.” Let someone else worry about the details. If you don’t do that another idea is to put a trusted relative or bridesmaid in charge of making sure things go smoothly on the big day so you can enjoy it. Designate tasks. If you do that you can let go of worry. Things will turn out the way they turn out.
After all the pomp and grandeur of the day is over you will want to sit back, relax and savor some of the memories you both made. Relax and enjoy yourself.
Take a deep breath and check out this Video from Fine Living for some helpful advice on how to stay in the moment on your big day. Click here to watch a Video about “How to relax and enjoy your wedding day!”
Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s “romantic” Wedding Website. Larry James is an award winning, non-denominational wedding officiant and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: 480-998-9411 or 800-725-9223. Pre-maritial relationship coaching is available and not required. You will find more than 470 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com. Something NEW about weddings is posted every 4th day on this Wedding BLOG. Check Larry’s availability.
Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com
NOTE: All articles, “LoveNotes” and wedding tips listed in this Wedding BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.
Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationship BLOG” at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com/
Follow Larry’s “Networking BLOG” at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Authors & Speakers” BLOG at: http://AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.wordpress.com
(more...)
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